A while back, you may have read my blog on Instagram and how to use the platform to exude confidence after a break up. So when I recently deleted the app, the world went into shock.
Sadly, Instagram and I were no longer seeing eye to eye. The honeymoon phase ended and spiraled straight into a messy divorce. I took some time to think about what I wanted, kicked my account to the curb, and finalized the divorce papers by hitting the delete button. And no, I’m not talking about “disabling” the account, where your session resumes upon logging in again. I decided that I don’t ever want to revisit the relationship and that it would be better to leave it in the past. Therefore, I deleted my account permanently.
I’m sure there are questions that need answering, so here are some reasons why the love affair went wrong:
He Made Me Lose Myself
I forgot why I was doing things. I began to ask myself if I genuinely wanted to do something because I enjoyed it or because I just wanted a post. There were countless times I would find myself out and about on weekends just so I could capture a picture of my friends and I having an “amazing” time. In reality, I would have been much happier at home reading a book or watching Mad Men. I wasn’t being true to who I was.
He Was Controlling My Life
I felt out of touch with reality. I was so concerned with what everyone else was doing that I couldn’t live in the moment and focus on what I was doing. I would have to ask people to repeat themselves when they spoke to me because I was so absorbed in my Instagram feed. I would waste time scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, when I could have been getting work done and using my time more efficiently. Not only that, I would let minor things on there distract me from more important tasks, which caused me stress and ruined my day. Basically, I was tired of being in everyone’s business and everyone being in mine.
He Was a Liar
Oh, the fakeness of it all. Before Instagram, pictures were taken to capture REAL moments so we could relive the happy memories we made, document significant dates in our lives, and celebrate meaningful events. Now pictures are staged, posed, edited, and curated to look like something completely different than what it actually was. Your party pic was great but honestly, you probably didn’t have that great of a time. Your friend Becky probably got the spins and had to leave early and you most likely drunk cried because that guy you like didn’t text you back. Photos posted on Instagram can be misleading and deceive people into believing something entirely different than the truth.
He Had Eyes for Other Girls
Ultimately, my self-esteem would waver. I would compare myself to the beautiful girls I would see on my discover page and rip myself to shreds. I would get ready for a night out feeling good only to feel insecure 10 minutes later after scrolling through my Instagram feed. I began to realize that I shouldn’t have to depend on the validation of other people to feel good about myself. I was tired of seeking out other people’s approval by monitoring the amount of likes and comments I received. In the end, I want people to like me because of the person that I am. Not for the life I pretend to lead or the outward appearance I show to the internet.
I don’t regret the relationship I had with Instagram, and we definitely had some good times together. Although it didn’t quite work out, I consider our relationship a learning experience. If I ever decide to rekindle the flame, changes would be necessary. For example, my account would be private for only close friends and family and I would post meaningful photos because I like them, not just to impress newsy, lurking followers.
If you’re reading this and debating whether or not you should delete your Instagram, well that is entirely up to you. My advice is to do whatever feels right. We all use social media differently and express ourselves in our own unique ways.
Just try not to lose yourself in the process and remember to put the phone down every once and a while and enjoy the moment.